Figuring it out
by dragonsilver
Summary: Draco had always been her world, her everything. Nothing lasts forever and Shanara's going to find that out the hardest way possible but love shows up in the most unexpected places... DMOC BZOC DMHP
1. Chapter 1 : matrimonial musings

_**Hey all..i know, I know, Ive ditched two stories already, im probably not the best fanfic writer at the moment (major cringe) but I promise I wont ditch this one. I actually have a plot for this one! Yay! So….read on…. And review pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!**_

Chapter 1

Arranged marriages were fairly normal in pureblood society. Usually, when you're told that your going to marry someone when you're ten years old, the idea sort of sticks.

Atleast that was the case with Shanara Montgomery. She had been engaged to Draco Malfoy for as long as she could remember. And in a way, they had been quite content with it. Unlike some other couples, they had embraced the idea and really did have a relationship. Shanara could only thank whatever gods who watched over herfor beingaffianced to a man that she did love.

Draco was everything she wanted. And for as long as she could remember, he had been her best friend and confidante, she had hardly needed anyone else. Other than her three other friends (Draco's closest friends as well), Theodore Nott, Pansy Parkinson and Blaise Zabini, she didn't really associate with anyone else in Slytherin. She had a scattering of friends in other houses. There was Luna, Terry and Padma in Ravenclaw , Eloise and Justin in Hufflepuff and from Gryffindor she was friends with Neville Longbottom and Seamus Finnegan as well as Ginny Weasley. Draco had always teased her about her strange choice in friends. Instead of picking the most popular or best looking, she had picked people she genuinely felt a connection with, no matter what their ancestry or their political alliances. Perhaps her funniest connection had been with Seamus. For some reason they had started out hating eachother but as abruptly as it started, Seamus Finnegan became her best friend almost overnight. Other than Draco of course, Draco was pretty much her world.

However, lately, Draco had been behaving fairly strangely. Instead of coming to sit with her by the fire as was his usual routine, for the past few weeks he had been avoiding her and spending more and more time away from the common room, and from the room they shared. It had started out as Draco's room, a privilege for being a prefect but he had asked her to move in with him and she had. She hadn't even thought twice about it. She loved him, it felt natural to wake up every morning with him and to have small rituals like tying his tie for him or watching him try (unsuccessfully) every morning to finish his homework and waiting up to kiss him good night. Rituals that of late Draco had seemed to have forgotten. She only saw him at night when he wandered in, quiet and thoughtful. Some nights he would make love to her passionately and then when he thought she was asleep, sit at the window for hours on end just thinking, some nights he would just clutch her and bury his head in her hair and sleep and some nights he would sleep on the far end of the bed as if trying to keep as much space between them as possible. She said nothing, she loved him in all his moods. They had a lifetime to figure things out.

Or so she thought…..


	2. Chapter 2 : behind closed doors

Chapter 2 

"Blaise?"

"Yes?"

"Where's Draco?" asked Shanara.

"I have absolutely no idea, babe" said Blaise, lounging on a comfortable green sofa near the fire.

"I haven't seen much of him lately" said Shanara, frowning.

"Neither have I" commented Pansy from where she lay, her head cushioned in her fiancé Theo's lap.

"Relax, I bet he's just owling his father or something" said Theo nonchalantly.

"Owling his father?" asked Shanara, surprised, "After the fall of the dark lord, I thought Draco had laid off the daily reports"

"you know Draco, papa's boy to the end" said Blaise, laughing.

Shanara laughed with all of them but couldn't help but feel a little uneasy. After waiting for Draco for another half hour, she grabbed Blaise and dragged him off on a search expedition.

Laughing, she and Blaise chased eachother down the corridors but kept a sharp lookout for Draco or any teachers. Once they narrowly escaped Filch by hiding in an empty classroom and evaded Snape by taking shelter behind an over huge suit of armor. Just as they were discussing whether the suit of armor had once belonged to Hagrid, they heard certain 'noises' coming from a broom closet behind them.

Laughing, Blaise put a finger over his lips and beckoned her over to the closet. Shaking her head wildly and suppressing her giggles the best she could, Shanara found herself helping Blaise open the door and catch the embarrassed couple red handed and red faced.

Little did she realize that by opening that door she would be changing her life forever.

Blaise wrenched the door open and Shanara found herself staring straight at her fiancé, the love of her life, Draco Malfoy, half dressed and wrapped around the someone so completely unexpected that for a second she could only stare, Harry Potter.

Shocked out of her wits, she backed away, ignoring Draco's calls and Blaise's attempts to steady her. Turning her back on the sight that would forever be imprinted on her mind, she walked away from what remained of her broken down world.

To say Blaise was shocked was an understatement. He knew Draco had been unfaithful before, hell, he wasn't called the slytherin sex god for nothing but Shanara finding out changed everything. Draco was now fully dressed (thank god!) and was walking silently by his side.

Blaise was suddenly so angry he could hardly see. Shanara had done nothing to deserve this. All she had done was love Draco. She had turned a blind eye to his affairs, supported him through thick and thin and trusted him blindly. It didn't take a genius to realize that in that one second Shanara's whole world had fallen apart.

"Blaise"

"Yes, Malfoy"

"You haven't called me Malfoy since I broke your nose when we were in the first year"

"well, this is way worse than that, Draco" Blaise said, coldly.

Draco suddenly grabbed his arm and said desperately, "this is different, Blaise".

Blaise rolled his eyes and said "yeah, Shanara knows…."

Draco shook his head and Blaise could hear the desperation and conviction in his voice when he said "this time is different, I really love him".

Exasperated, Blaise grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him "You're engaged to Shanara, you fool!"

"Not anymore" said Draco quietly.

Blaise's laughter died on his lips when he saw Draco's face. It was painfully obvious that Draco had never been so serious in his life.

"what do you mean" he demanded.

"I wrote to my father" said Draco, head bowed, "I told him I wanted out of the engagement, that I wanted to be bonded with Harry"

"And he agreed?"

"Of course he did, he's Harry Potter, how could he say no"

"Yes, how could he…" said Blaise quietly, "And Shanara?" he asked.

"I don't know" said Draco, "I simply don't know".


	3. Chapter 3 : broken down dreams

Chapter 3

The common room was empty. She made her way to the room that they had shared for two years and sat on the bed, staring blankly at the wall. She glanced around the room and looked in disbelief at the pictures of her and Draco on the walls, their clothes hanging together in their huge cupboard, the way his books were mixed up with hers, the way his bed side table had a picture of them smiling and waving at the camera. A few hours ago she had sat in this room, had laid on their bed and had thanked god for her blessings.

Suddenly, a white hot rage overcame her and she tore the sheets off the bed, god only knew if he had made love to Potter on those sheets, sheets she had chosen because they were his favorite color. She tore the pictures off the walls and threw them onto the floor, she threw his photo frame at a wall and threw all her clothes into her trunk and dumped her books in after them. Grabbing everything she could possibly think of, she dragged her trunk to the girls dormitory.

Pansy, Daphne and Millicent were still up, looking at magazines and gossiping. They fell silent when she came in. She headed for the empty bed and drew the drapes shut around her, cast a silencing charm and proceeded to try to wrap her mind around the fact that the boy she had been in love with nearly all her life, probably didn't give a damn about her.

She found herself imagining Draco with different people, she didn't cry, she just lay there, too shocked and heart broken to shed tears.

In the dim light, she looked at her engagement ring. Beautifully wrought in platinum, a delicate pattern of diamonds and sapphires that made up the Malfoy crest, claiming hers as Draco's and him as hers. She hadn't taken it off since she was 12 years old and Narcissa Malfoy had pressed it into her hands, smiling, and calling her 'daughter'. Lucius had hugged her, an unusual demonstration of affection for him and Draco himself had smiled at her, a smile that had made her fall in love with him. Slowly, she pulled it off and held it in her hands, just looking at it. Her hands felt bare without it. She felt alone and unprotected, naked. Clutching it in one hand, she buried her face in her pillow.

Then the tears came.

Pansy Parkinson was worried. Shanara had moved back into the girls dormitory, something that none of them had ever anticipated. And she had quietly gotten into bed and Pansy could've sworn that she heard her whisper a silencing charm before shutting her drapes.

Shanara and she had been friends for a very long time. They had played together as children, laughing and shrieking, running around their huge and dusty mansions. As they grew older, they would often stay up all night and talk about their respective fiancés. She had listened to Shanara talk about Draco all the time and Shanara had listened to her long stories and problems with Theo. Pansy loved Theo but she knew that it paled to the relationship that Shanara and Draco appeared to have. There were a lot of rumours floating around about Draco but she figured that they must all be malicious gossip, who in their right minds would give up what they had.

Deciding that she would find out exactly had happened the next morning, Pansy gave in to sleep, having no idea that two beds away from her, a persons world had been turned upside down.


	4. Chapter 4 : breakfast from hell

Chapter 4

When Shanara walked into the great hall the next day, she knew immediately that the entire school was discussing her break up. Potter and his friends were sitting at the Gryffindor table and admiring something, probably some gift from Draco. Her heart tugged at her sharply when she remembered that only a couple of weeks ago, Draco had been buying her presents. Pushing the thought away, she walked past the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw tables, her anguish not showing at all on her face when she heard the snide whispers and comments directed at her. Reaching the far end of the table where she knew she wouldn't be disturbed, she sat down and began to eat. The murmurs around her grew and all of a sudden, she was aware of her name being called from the Gryffindor table, looking up, she noticed Dean Thomas, one of Seamus' friends, standing on the table, yelling for her attention. She was about to smile when he screamed "Hey Montgomery! What did you do to Malfoy? Must have been pretty bad – the bugger switched teams!"

Roaring with laughter, Dean sat down, the rest of his house mates joined him, patting him on his back and smiling, even the Ravenclaws seemed to think it was funny though the Hufflepuff 's were smiling at me sympathetically and shaking their heads. As much as she wanted to hex Thomas, Shanara finished her breakfast before walking out. On her way out she stopped at the Gryffindor table and smiled sweetly at Dean Thomas and said "well, you know Thomas, if you wanted in on the action, you should have just asked, Potter seemed like a big enough whore to turn you too if you wanted". Leaving the Gryffindor's dumbstruck, she walked off to her first class.

Ron Weasley gaped after her and turned to address his friends, "remind me never to mess with her".

Harry Potter felt awful. He loved Draco and he knew Draco loved him but Shanara Montgomery was a factor he had totally forgotten about. Draco had told him about her, how he was engaged to her and how they had been together forever but he had never actually connected it all up in his head, it hadn't mattered. Until Dean had made that awful comment at breakfast, suddenly Shanara Montgomery wasn't just a name anymore. Harry had seen how everyone had jeered at her and noticed how pale she had gotten after Dean's dramatic statement. That's why, he was waiting outside her potions class, feeling guilty and ridiculous, he wanted to apologize. Draco had tried to dissuade him and even Blaise had bluntly told him to go fuck himself and not bother her. But he couldn't help it, he needed to get it off his chest.

As the class ended and she came out, he fell into step with her.

"something you wanted, Potter?" she asked quietly.

"No…"

"then why are you here?"

"I want to apologize"

"That's nice"

Harry swallowed, he knew it would be hard saying what he had to say but it was even harder because Shanara seemed so calm. If she had cried or screamed or even tried to hit him, he would've known what to do but this calmness upset him more than he could say.

"I'm sorry for the way things turned out" he said, "you have every right to be upset and I understand if you hate me and Draco"

Shanara laughed. It hung in the air, it wasn't the kind of laughter that brought a smile to ones face, infact, it sounded more like it was wrung out her, hollow and bitter.

"You don't understand anything, Potter" quickening her pace, she threw over her shoulder " I hope you feel better after you got that off your chest, Potter".

At the end of the hallway she turned one last time and said "have a nice life, Potter".

Looking into her eyes, he almost felt that she meant it.

It made him feel worse than ever.


	5. Chapter 5 : the summons

Chapter 5

By the time lunch came around, Shanara was heartily sick of the snide comments and knowing looks that she was getting. Not to mention all the propositioning and suggestive comments coming her way. She was very tempted to pull a Ginny Weasley on them and send a powerful bat bogey hex at Zacharias Smith when he had actually grabbed her by the arm and tried to snog her. Thankfully Blaise had intervened and Smith was currently in the hospital wing getting his face clear of the boils Blaise had inflicted upon him.

Blaise walked to lunch with her and sat down next to her.

"Don't you want to sit near Draco?" she asked curiously

"Nah…Draco can take care of himself"

"so can I " she pointed out, annoyed.

"I know, but I want to sit with you" Blaise said, smiling at her.

Swallowing her pride, Shanara sat meekly eating her food, telling herself that her day couldn't possibly get worse.

She knew as soon as the thought entered her mind that something worse was already on its way so when a howler landed on her lap, she wasn't exactly surprised. Staring at it for a minute, she opened it and sat back, waiting to hear what her darling mother had to say to her now. She was completely astonished on hearing her father's cold drawl instead of her mother's more strident tones. She knew the entire hall was listening, post never came at lunch and howlers were few and far between as a rule among the student body. Well, unless you were a Weasley twin.

"Shanara. Pack your bags. I wish to see you at home this weekend. I have already discussed the matter with your headmistress and I expect to see you back home by dinner on Saturday. You know what this is about. I'm extremely disappointed in you. You have shamed our family. I will deal with you when I see you".

Shaken, Shanara refused to look at Draco, as quietly as possible, she asked Blaise "Did Draco tell his father about Potter?"

"Yes, he wanted to call off the engagement"

Shanara nodded. She was in shock. She couldn't believe that Draco hadn't even told her about writing to his father. Blaise took her hand in his and lead her out of the great hall and back to her dorm. He sat on the bed and watched as she blankly began to pack her things. A few minutes later, Pansy came in and sat next to Blaise, silently adding her support to his.

Shanara attempted a smile which judging from their expressions came out as a grimance, and said " I'll be fine, guys"

"yeah, of course you will" said Blaise reassuringly.

"Of course" said Pansy, "they're not so old fashioned that they would enforce the old penalties"

"penalties?" asked Blaise, this was something that he had never heard of.

"yeah, I've heard that it was awful but I don't know exactly what it was" explained Pansy.

"40 lashes.." said Shanara quietly, her back to them.

"lashes?" asked Blaise just as quietly

Shanara faced him with a twisted smile, "with a whip, Blaise, women who lose their men aren't worth very much in pureblood society"

"But the Malfoy's love you!" protested Blaise, "its not your fault that Draco called it off"

" I know" said Shanara, still smiling, "but that was when I was marrying their son"

Blaise could find nothing to say. The moments he spent watching Shanara pack were the longest of his life.


	6. Chapter 6 : lashing out

Chapter 6

Holding her head high, Shanara stepped out of the fire place and looked at one of the house elves for directions. The tiny creature was agitated and kept wringing its hands as it told Shanara that her father was waiting for her in his study.

Standing outside his door, Shanara braced herself for what was to come. As soon as she had received her fathers howler she had known that she would be severely punished. She had never heard her father so angry before. She knew that the two families were close and that Lucius and her father had many business agreements and worked well together. Their mothers had been friends since they themselves had attended Hogwarts and even her elder sister, Marya, had married Lucius's nephew Adrian. Shanara's marriage to Draco had meant a lot to both families. As the male, Draco had the right to call off the engagement for whatever purposes he deemed worthy. However, she thought bitterly, he would never be blamed, he would never be punished. That joy was reserved only for her as dictated by the ancient laws of pureblooded society.

Knocking, she let herself in.

"Father?"

"Come in"

Shanara's father, Beren Montgomery was an impressive looking man. Despite his cold exterior, Shanara knew that he adored his two daughters and greatly valued their happiness. She knew that the punishment he was about to bestow upon her would hurt him just as much as it hurt her.

She would get her forty lashes. She knew that. And he would be just about it. Striking evenly and emotionlessly. And afterwards he would drown his sorrows in firewhisky and be unable to look at her for months. For a fleeting moment her hatred for Draco surfaced, he had abandoned her, knowing full well what awaited her. As quickly as it came, it vanished, she couldn't hate Draco. She wished that she could but she knew it wouldn't help anything.

Beren Montgomery watched his beautiful daughters face quietly. Though he showed no emotion, his heart was breaking. Shanara stood before him, showing no fear. Even in the midst of his anguish he couldn't help but smile wryly at that, she had always been a fearless child, so impulsive and caring.

She knelt before him gracefully and slipped off her outer robe, leaving her back bare. Flinching inwardly, he raised his whip and struck her square across her back. Detaching himself from his task, he noticed that though his strokes did not vary, she did not make a single noise. The only sounds were the crack of his whip and the anxious murmurs coming from the next room where Marya and his wife were.

After he had given her the specified 40 lashes he dropped his whip and moved forward to pick her up.

Shanara rose by herself, unsteadily but sure of herself. Smiling gently at him, she slipped on her robe and before she left the room, threw her arms around him and kissed him on his cheek. "I'm sorry, Papa" she said.

Beren smiled at her and left her to the mercies of her mother and Marya as he poured himself a glass of firewhisky, cursed the laws of society that demanded that he inflicted pain on his own child and said in a low voice "No, my love, It is I who should be sorry".

* * *

Draco Malfoy was in his own private hell. It was so easy to forget things when he was with Harry but as he faced Pansy Parkinson, Blaise Zabini and Theo Nott in a silent hallway where he and Harry had been trying to get some time alone, he knew that his time had run out.

Blaise spoke first, his voice dripping with emotion "You bastard", he grabbed Draco and threw him up against a wall.

Theo said " you're a shit, Draco, I cant believe that you did what u did"

Pansy was apparently so angry that she couldn't speak.

Draco didn't fight it and he stopped Harry from intervening with a look of warning. He knew that he deserved what he was going to get.

"I'd like to give you exactly what she gets" snarled Blaise, "Infact, I'd give you 10 more lashes for being such a fucker"

"lashes?" asked Draco, stunned out of his passive silence.

Pansy laughed a little hysterically, "Yes, lashes! You know…with whips…it's the fucking penalty, Draco!"

Draco was bewildered "but that's ancient…they wouldn't follow that rule!"

Theo laughed bitterly and said "oh but they do, Draco, I just had a letter from Marya, Shanara paid in full for your bullshit".

Disgusted and angry, they left, as they walked away, Pansy fired her parting shot "I truly hope you get what you deserve, Malfoy"

Draco sat on the cold stone floor. He felt Harry's arms encircle him and vaguely realized that Harry was whispering comforting things in his ear.

He had never felt so alone in his life.


	7. Chapter 7 : eavesdropping

Chapter 7

Seamus Finnigan was star gazing. This was pretty unusual. There were a lot of things that Seamus was famed for, being able to consume large amounts of firewhisky, dancing irish jigs while completely drunk, fascinating the ladies (or so he liked to think) but star gazing was a first for him. He glanced sidewards at his best friend Shanara.

He knew he wasn't exactly the model best friend. He had never been very dependable, hadn't even gone to her when he heard about her horrific break up but for some reason, she was always there for him and he had never even seen her cry…not even once. And it made him feel guilty as hell.

"Shanara?"

"Yes?"

"Why do you still give a shit about me?"

Shanara turned to face him, surprised, "what!"

"I mean, I'm not exactly the best friend every girl dreams about, I wasn't even there for you when…"

Shanara interrupted him saying " Listen, Seamus, I care about you a lot but I didn't expect you to take sides…to choose between your housemate and me…I'm in Slytherin…I know all about mixed up loyalties"

"But…"

"Just forget it…please"

So Seamus fell silent. And instead of watching the stars, he found himself watching Shanara with her sad, beautiful face and wishing he could be the person she thought he was.

* * *

Shanara walked back to her dormitory, as she passed the room that she had shared with Draco, she heard Blaise's , Pansy's and Theo's voices as well as Draco's and Potter's. She wasn't surprised. They had all grown up together. She knew they would forgive him eventually. Especially when they saw that Shanara didn't seem to really hate him. And she didn't. It was near impossible to hate Draco. He always looked happy, was always cracking jokes and he didn't really get in her way. 

Walking into her dormitory, she lay on her bed staring up at her ceiling, blankly. It hurt a little that Potter had walked in and stolen her place among her friends so easily. But she didn't blame any of them, infact, had circumstances been different she was sure she'd have liked Potter just as well as any of them.

"Shanara?"

"Yes, Blaise?"

Blaise and Theo had just walked into her room and seated themselves at the foot of her bed.

"You want to go to the kitchens with us?" asked Theo, awkwardly.

"Us?" she said, valiantly trying to smile.

"Um…yeah….us…Pans, Ha- Potter, Draco, Blaise and I?"

She knew it was hard for them but she also knew that her going would just make things harder. She felt a little pang of emotion, a little bit of happiness, when she realized that they hadn't completely forgotten or replaced her.

"thank you but no…you know that it would just be difficult for all of us" she said, smiling at both of them and ruffling Blaise's hair.

Theo nodded and left the room, looking visibly relieved.

"I hate seeing you like this" said Blaise in a low voice.

"Like what?" asked Shanara, trying to be lighthearted, picking up one of Millicent's fashion magazines and flipping through it.

"You know what I mean" said Blaise, "You can't hide from it forever".

Suddenly angry, Shanara snapped back " I'll do what I please. Don't presume to tell me what I can and cannot do"

Blaise looked at her pleadingly and said "We love you, we want you to be happy, even Draco…though he's been such a jerk… he cares about you".

Shanara laughed, "He does, doesn't he? I mean…he showed that when he wrote to his father breaking off our engagement without telling me, sending me straight to my own father to be punished for his mistakes…for letting me find about the whole thing via howler…yes, Blaise, he REALLY cares about me".

Blaise fell silent and belatedly Shanara realized that the door to her dorm had been left open and that she could hear Theo, Pansy, Draco and Potter whispering in the corridor, obviously having heard the whole argument.

Shanara had never felt so miserable in her life. Even Blaise had turned on her. There they were, her friends of 17 years and they were all standing outside her door eavesdropping. She felt sudden tears surge to her eyes and said in a voice as steady as she could make it "Get out, Blaise"

Blaise looked bewildered, "What?"

"GET OUT" she screamed, shoving him off her bed, "Go to your bloody accomplices outside and tell them what Ive told you, fill in the blanks since they were so obviously eavesdropping outside my door and you were helping them!"

She shoved Blaise outside and shut the door and slid down to the floor, her back facing the door and gave vent to her tears.

The corridor was silent.

* * *

**Blue-orange hills: thanks so much for your review... keep them coming in ppl...! **


	8. Chapter 8 : meet the montgomerys

Chapter 9

Christmas vacation came sooner than she expected. Never had Shanara been so glad at the thought of going home. She found herself experiencing an almost physical ache of longing to see her parents, Marya and her two brothers, Alejandro and Robert.

True to Montgomery tradition, the girls had attended Hogwarts while the boys did their schooling in a military school in Spain.

As Shanara sat under a tree beside the lake, she found herself contemplating her family and their history.

The Montgomery's were a family well established in both their native Spain as well as in England. Their power and prestige was legendary as well as their secretiveness and mystery. Shanara remembered well the first time she had realized that her family was different from any other, more so than even Draco's or Blaise's though they too belonged to extremely powerful pure blooded families, she had been six, impulsive and curious. She had followed her eldest brother, Robert, to one of his lessons held in the depths of the family mansion. Her uncle, Marco had been his tutor at that point. Fascinated, she had watched as Marco had taught her brother spells that no school would ever teach, old blood magic, songs of sirens, subtle methods of gaining information…things that her family, the Montgomery's, were famous for.

She had never told anyone about that day. But it had sealed her future. She wasn't like any of the other Montgomery women. Her father would often laugh at her, half proud, half sorrowful and say that she had the ancient Spanish blood dancing through her veins, the same fierce independence and passion, the zest for life. It had nearly killed him to see her buried in the sorrows and rigid boundaries enforced upon pure blooded women in society but they both knew that it was the way of the world, one adapted to survive.

A usually strict man, Beren Montgomery, adored his younger daughter and could not help but indulge her in some ways. He allowed her to learn to fight with a sword as his sons did and to learn how to ride. He even allowed his sons to teach her the rudimentary arts of battle dueling. He watched over her from afar, merely smiling with quiet pride when she easily trounced Alejandro at sword play and out rode Robert. He allowed it all because he recognized the same spirit in her as in him and he knew that she needed some outlet or the consequences would be dire.

So every summer she was allowed to run wild on their estate, throw caution to the winds and be herself on the condition that she would behave herself when she returned to Hogwarts.

Shanara found herself thinking about her brothers in particular. Her eldest brother, Robert was the epitome of Montgomery good looks, tall, dark, with fine features and a quick smile, he charmed all who met him with his quiet intelligence and good manners. Robert had been raised to be the head of his house and he was the apple of his mother's eye.

Alejandro on the other hand was completely different. Passionate, impetuous and dramatic, he was quick to anger and quick to laugh. He dimpled his way out of scrapes and used his incorrigible charm and good looks to get of trouble. Shanara loved him the most fiercely as he did her. They were twins, born within two minutes of eachother. Alejandro was the elder and all their lives had been her champion and her best friend. When they had been separated to go to Hogwarts, they had both been devastated and even now, 6 years later, wrote to eachother everyday.

She hadn't been able to bring herself to write to Alex (as they called him) since her break up with Draco. Alex had been extremely fond of Draco, looking on him as a second brother. She knew that the split had hurt her whole family. Her mother was miserable that she would not be marrying Draco and that her father was upset as well. Marya was incensed and she was sure that Robert was too. But she knew that Alex would be the most hurt and would feel her pain as acutely as if it had been his own break up. She also knew that he would be worried sick about her if she didn't answer atleast one of his letters.

Walking back to her dorm, she ignored all her peers, who were all still gossiping about her spectacular break up and her consequent self exile from the most powerful group of friends in the school. She had repulsed all attempts at reconciliation with Blaise, Pansy and Theo and had cocooned herself in her own world, talking only to Seamus and occasionally Ginny. She dreaded the day that she would have to break out of her shell and return to the harsh world around her.

On her bed, she saw an envelope printed with her brother's familiar writing. She noticed that Alex's handwriting was erratic, he was undoubtedly worried about her.

Opening the letter and reading it, she found herself wishing that the earth would swallow her up. Her brother was obviously being the messenger of ill will. The annual Montgomery ball (she was reminded) was being held, as per usual, on Christmas eve. Due to recent circumstances the Malfoys were being invited to stay a week at the manor to 'mutually rebuild their bridges' and reconnect as families. Pansy, Theo, Potter, Granger and Weasley would be residing there too as they were to be guests of the Malfoy's and therefore included in the invitation.

Alejandro and Robert were coming to escort them to the manor. They both knew that their sister needed them now more than ever.


	9. Chapter 9 : home again

Chapter 10

Shanara was packed and waiting in the entrance hall before any of the others got there. She knew that the few moments of snatched privacy with her brothers were few and far between and that she must use them wisely. She had already planned out a speech to set their anxieties to rest and to make sure that that holiday went off smoothly.

However, when she saw Robert enter through the huge doors, she felt her smile falter and when she saw Alejandro, his usually smiling face miserable and concerned, she couldn't help but throw herself into his arms and wish that she would never have to leave them. Robert silently hugged her from the behind and sandwiched between her brothers, for the first time in months, Shanara felt safe.

She was so wrapped up in them that she didn't notice the tall, solitary figure of Lucius Malfoy come in behind them and when they finally let go of her, she involuntarily ran to him and hugged him as she would her own father.

Lucius was a hard man. He had worked all his life to keep the Malfoy's where they were, wealthy, powerful and unbreakable. However, his grief over the break up of Draco's and Shanara's engagement was very real. Montgomery or not, Shanara had been virtually his daughter and he was thoroughly ashamed of his son's behaviour.

Looking down at the girl before him, looking so young and vulnerable, for the millionth time, he found himself cursing Draco and his stupidity.

"Hello, my dear.." he said affectionately.

"Hello, Uncle Luce" she said, smiling up at him with the same affection.

Before he could say more though, the rest of the travelers arrived, noisily dragging their trunks and chatting. Lucius saw his son trailing at the back, refusing to meet his eyes, tentatively smiling at Alejandro and Robert and flinching at their cold smiles and nods. Lucius almost screamed with exasperation. Draco had hurt and humiliated their sister. They knew the realities of what society was like and they very rightfully blamed Draco for the problems their sister would face in the future.

After the awkward introductions all round ( Hermione exclaiming that she didn't know Shanara had a twin and Ron muttering mutinously about being under the same roof as 'deatheaters') the entire lot portkeyed to Montgomery Manor.

As she stepped through the doors of her home, Shanara found herself instantly swept into the arms of her mother and after her, Marya and in turn all her aunts, uncles and cousins, laughing, she hugged them all and exclaimed over their news and playfully bullied her cousins. They all knew what had happened but tactfully refrained from commenting. Looking around, she saw that her father and grandfather had placed themselves apart from the crowd near the fireplace and were watching her with fond smiles. Grinning, she ran to them and hugged them, thrilled to see them again.

Here were the men that would never let her down nor hurt her and she loved them with all her heart.

Talking to them all excitedly, she allowed herself to be dragged to dinner and later to bed.

Smiling quietly at the silliness of the childish tradition, she waited for her siblings to join her as they always did the first night that they were all together again.

Alex danced in first, flopping on the bed in the most undignified manner and tickling her unmercifully, Robert waltzed in soon after, poised and unflustered as ever and lastly Marya, giggly and fairylike floated in. After the usual squabbles of sleeping arrangements, they all settled into different corners of the four poster bed and took a good look at eachother.

Alex, Robert and Marya were shocked at the change in their little sister. Shanara had lost weight, her perpectually slim form was thinner than ever and her face wore the look of sleeplessness and emotional anguish. She was smiling now but they knew her well enough to realize that there was a newfound bitterness in that simple smile that had never been there before.

Though they stayed away from the topic of Draco and spoke of everything else. They couldn't help but realize that the Shanara that they sent to Hogwarts that year had come back a very different person from their beloved baby sister.

This certainly didn't make them care a whole lot more for Draco.


	10. Chapter 10: long due explanations

Chapter 11

Shanara faced the dawn quietly, standing on the balcony surrounding her room. Looking inside through the French windows, she saw her siblings, sleeping peacefully.

Alex sprawled across half the bed, spread eagled; Roberto slept easily, his head tilted to one side, his arms thrown behind him in youthful slumber and Marya, dainty and doll like even in sleep, was curled up at the foot of the bed.

Shanara smiled silently at them, loving the feeling of belonging that came to her so rarely these days. She alone had not been able to sleep, ideas and half realized dreams making sleep impossible.

Moving as quietly as possible, she dressed herself in a set of Alex's riding clothes. It was early enough for her to sneak out dressed in boys clothes unnoticed and she knew if she was caught the worst that could happen was a good scold which would be worth it – she hated riding in dresses, it was so impractical.

Easing herself out of the room, she lightheartedly ran down to the stables. This was her home, where she could be free, be the Shanara she had been before Draco, before Hogwarts.

Three hours later, when she endeavored to sneak back into the house, she found herself guiltily trying to plead her case with her uncle Miguel. Though he found his niece's antics hilarious, Miguel knew better than to encourage her and told her to go report to her father. Grimacing, Shanara ran up to his study and barged in, only to find her father entertaining Lucius, Draco and Harry there. Embarrassed, she tried to withdraw but was brought up short by her father demanding to know what devilry she had been upto.

Laughing, she said ' I was riding, papa'

'that I can see….why must you insist on wearing Alex's clothes I will never know !'

'Because riding in a dress is horrible'

'you are a lady, you know that, what would your mother say?"

'nothing if you don't tell her' said Shanara, hopefully.

Laughing at her and gently swiping at her playfully, her father commanded her to be off and to make herself respectable.

She fled and as she ran to her room, she heard him make excuses for her unconventional behavior to Lucius. She knew she was safe, Uncle Lucius would never spoil her fun in something as simple as riding merely because of what she wore.

As Shanara ran out of the study, Draco found himself staring at her retreating back. He had never seen Shanara like that – laughing and free, carelessly dressed in boys clothes, sauntering into her fathers study as if she didn't have a care in the world. Shanara had always been quiet and conventional. Though she had a wicked sense of humour, it was strictly tongue in cheek and she had certainly never ignored convention by doing things normally forbidden to pureblooded women. He almost said something about it but catching his father's eye, he decided to keep his mouth shut.

Excusing themselves a little later, Harry, Draco and Lucius left the study and as they walked down the corridor, Lucius looked around carefully and indicated that they follow him into an empty room.

From the looks of it, it had been a morning parlor which had been unused for years. Lucius surveyed the room rapidly and turned back to Draco and Harry who were looking at him, confused.

Lucius shut the door and cast an imperturbable charm on the door and then a silencing charm so that noone would hear their conversation.

Finally, precautions taken, he turned to the now slightly worried duo before him.

'Alright, now we can finally talk' said Lucius, his eyes glinting dangerously.

'Yes' said Draco, moving forward slightly as if shielding Harry from his father's fury.

His movements merely served to infuriate Lucius further.

Ignoring Harry, Lucius glared at Draco and said 'well, what do you have to say for yourself?'

'I love Harry, father, and I'm not about to apologize for that'

'No, but I damn well deserve an apology for putting me in this position'

Storming around the room, Lucius let loose the rage that had been consuming for days now.

'How could you, Draco? The Montgomery's are our FRIENDS. They stood by us when no one else in the pureblooded community would. They pledged their daughters to us – the ultimate gesture of good faith. They are the reason that we are not dead! They are far more influential in this world than we are…'

'The Malfoy's aren't paupers, father, we are powerful….' ,Interrupted Draco.

'You fool!' screamed Lucius, ' We are but children in comparison to the Montgomerys ! The blood of Merlin runs through their veins – how can we possibly be more powerful than they are. They are being infinitely merciful by allowing us to keep up this sham of a friendship. They are fully within their rights to cut us down like animals'.

'I don't care about what they do! They can do nothing to hurt us' returned Draco, stubbornly.

'Beren Montgomery can bankrupt me in a heartbeat', returned Lucius, 'how long would you stay on your high horse without everything you grew up with, Draco? No money, no power, no respect – you would lose everything!'

'He'd still have me' said Harry, in a low voice.

Lucius turned to him and said quietly 'And he would hate you'. Holding his hand up to stall Draco's protests, he continued 'He would have to live with the knowledge that though he loves you, you were the reason that he had disgraced the people who brought him into the world, the ones who were everything to him before you came along; that he had single handedly broken down the work of centuries of Malfoys….do you really think that Draco would love you for long?'

Both Harry and Draco looked at him and in his glance they read anger, compassion and was that fear?

Turning away from them and walking towards the window, Lucius said 'All that stands between us and total annihilation is the fact that Marya is married into our family and that Shanara has shown a remarkable tendency towards forgiveness'. He paused for a second and said 'Something that the world will not show her, I'm afraid'.

'I don't understand', said Harry, 'Draco broke off their engagement and I understand if she is upset but it's not the end of the world'.

Lucius remained silent and as Harry looked at his lover, he was shocked to see how drawn Draco looked.

'It's not that simple, my love' said Draco, running his fingers through his hair nervously. Without looking Harry in the eye, he continued 'Purebloods live by a code. They are pledged to eachother while they are still children, they grow up together and finally marry and are bound together magically forever. When they are pledged to eachother, in other words, when they are engaged, they begin to share a magical bond', glancing up at Harry, he said 'There is a ceremony that joins us together – makes our magic one'.

'I don't understand' said Harry, confused 'What do you mean makes your magic one ?'

Draco tried his best to explain, 'The engagement is supposed to be the first step of our life together…the first step is for us to bond our magic together – that way we are of same magical capacity, neither is stronger and we are equal in our partnership.'

'But you broke the engagement' said Harry, uncomprehending.

'Yes,' said Draco, 'It is also a rule that the man's level of power determines the balance of power in the relationship'.

'So you're saying that no matter how powerful or weak the woman is, from the moment she is engaged, her level of magic will be the same as her betrothed?' asked Harry incredulously.

'Exactly' said Draco, glad he had grasped the concept.

'I still don't see what the problem is' said Harry.

'The problem, Potter, is that once the engagement is broken, the effects are two fold, firstly, she will be considered an inferior member of society – a magical slut….she has shared her magic with someone who won't eventually be her husband. And in our world, magic is more important than even the chastity of the body, though' he glared at Draco, 'I'm sure Draco has taken care of that as well'.

Draco flushed and refused to meet Harry's eyes.

Harry felt his whole world crashing down upon him. All his life he had tried to make things right in the world and though he realized now that that was an impossible ambition, he never thought that he would be one to make someone else's life so miserable. The severity of Shanara's punishment suddenly made sense to him, how bitter and angry she was as well and the true weight of how forgiving she had been settled now upon his shoulders. Draco had condemned her to a life of misery. Harry was no stranger to the rigidity of pureblood society, had he not listened to a thousand of Sirius's rants about his family and from what he understood, the Black's and the Malfoy's were mild compared to the Montgomery's. With a pang he found himself wondering what Sirius would've said – what his parents would have said. Pushing this uncomfortable thought to the back of his mind, he asked 'What is the second thing?'

Lucius finally faced them and said 'when a magical bond is broken, the two bonded recover their pre-bonded levels of magic'. Looking Harry in the eye he said 'The unfortunate side effect is that they will always retain a little bit of the person they were bonded to'

'what do you mean?' asked Harry, worried for Draco.

'It means that because Draco's power was the deciding force in the bond, he will come away unscathed but Shanara will always have the imprint of Draco upon her soul. In other words, Draco will always be a part of her and she will have to live with the memory of him branded into her very being'.

With these parting words, Lucius opened the door and left the room, leaving Harry and Draco together.

Looking into Harry's eyes, Draco realized that though Harry was right next to him and that he held Harry's hand in his, once again he was all alone.


	11. Chapter 11 : A whole new world

Chapter 12

'What did he mean – about having you imprinted upon her soul?' Harry asked Draco, suddenly.

They were sitting together in the apple orchards. Theo, Pansy, Hermione and Ron were lounging in the sunshine a few yards away and Blaise was sitting on a branch, swinging his legs and eating an apple.

Sensing a storm approaching, everyone else pretended not to have heard and so it was to silence that Draco said 'She will always feel a connection towards me. A little like an ache that will never go away'.

Harry was silent and Draco continued 'It will get easier though, with time the connection will lessen and eventually be lost altogether'.

Harry didn't say anything, simply reached down into the grass next to him and found an apple and bit into it.

Before Draco could say anymore, they heard voices and Shanara and Alex walked into the orchard, Alex was singing loudly and kept making bulls horns and pretending to gore his sister. Laughing, she pretended to run from him and together they were a picture of happiness.

They waved when they saw the others but made no effort to come over and join them. Alex flopped on the grass gracefully, leaving Harry to wonder how he managed to flop like an aristocrat – if indeed there was such a thing. Shanara lay next to him, her head pillowed on his chest and both of them proceeded to cloud watch if their gestures were any indication.

Harry watched them with a sort of fascination. He had never seen siblings like them before… Ron's brothers and sisters, though extremely fond of eachother, were never openly affectionate and certainly he had never seen any brother stroking his sisters hair or tickling her with a long blade of grass or spontaneously hugging her from time to time.

'They're twins, you know' said Hermione, interrupting his thoughts. He smiled up at her from where she stood, having come over to join him and Draco.

'that's why they're so different with eachother' she continued, reading his thoughts.

'they have always been close' commented Blaise, 'they write to eachother every day'.

'everyday?' asked Pansy, surprised, 'I only write to my sister when I think of it – which is about once a month if she's lucky'.

'twins are different' said Blaise, matter of factly, watching Shanara looking happy for the first time in months.

Margarite Carmena Zabini was an extremely powerful woman. She had enough money to fill 12 high security vaults in Gringotts and beauty enough to snare the most insensible of men. She was rumored to have no heart, to love nothing and noone but herself. With the nickname of 'Black widow', she inflamed desire in the hearts of all men and though she had pledged eternal love many a time, drunk from the cup of truth, had been bound heart and magic to seven different men and her star shone brightly, if coldly, amongst the constellations of pure blooded society - she remained to the end, the Black widow.

Narcissa Malfoy sighed as she looked across the room at her best friend. Margarite might deceive others but the Malfoys knew her for what she was – a woman who had lost all things save one.

Blaise lay sprawled on the floor, his ebony hair and eyes contrasting sharply with the gentle pattern of water lilies that covered the floor of the evening parlor they had retired to. He had his chin propped on his hand and he was gazing at the flames crackling in the grate before him, obviously contemplating life.

Blaise was everything to Margarite. When her first husband had left her, she had been desperately miserable. She had pledged herself to him heart and soul and was inconsolable until she realized that he had left her for another woman. From that day forth Margarite had waged a silent but deadly war on all the men in her life. All that is, except one.

Watching Blaise was one of her most profound joys. He represented all that was good to her, he was a handsome boy and wise in the ways of the world and he knew that his mother loved him, no, perhaps more than that – that she needed him. He loved her dearly and though he hated what she did, he understood her in ways that no one else could.

Lucius Malfoy, sitting on at the desk in the corner of the room watched all the occupants of the room, quietly. Margarite, his wife's best friend – a woman who all lusted after but none loved and yet whom he respected and treated kindly for Narcissa's sake if not for her own; Narcissa, the woman he loved; Draco – his heir and currently his biggest disappointment, Harry his son's chosen companion and Blaise Zabini.

If asked what he thought of Blaise, Lucius would have replied 'A fine young man, one who I would have been proud to call my own'. A smile crossed his lips as he considered how Blaise would've looked as a Malfoy. He permitted himself a small chuckle and smiled at his wife as she looked at him questioningly. He shook his head and then said 'Alright, off to bed'.

'Father !' protested Draco 'We aren't children !'

'No, but the Christmas Ball is tomorrow and I need you to all be well rested'.

Ignoring all protests, he gestured for Harry and Draco to leave the room. As Blaise made his way out, Lucius called him back and gestured for him to shut the door behind him.

After waiting a minute or so till Draco and Harry's footsteps died away and they could no longer hear Draco's complaints, he turned to Blaise, who had gone over to sit beside his mother.

Addressing himself to Margarite, he said, 'Margarite, I have something to discuss with you'.

Surprised, Margarite said 'yes?' though she made it a point to have no dealings with men, she trusted Lucius, he had been married to her best friend for more than 20 years and he had never once strayed or in any way made Narcissa unhappy.

'Blaise is now 17 and yet unpledged' said Lucius bluntly.

Blaise stared at Lucius in shock and then said 'I don't want to be pledged to someone – I want to choose my own bride'.

'I know', said Lucius quietly but firmly 'However, you must realize that though you are willing to wait, no one else is. By the time you decide you are ready to wed, all the pureblooded women you know will be married'.

Blaise halted, Lucius had a point, all the pureblooded women he knew were pledged in some way or the other.

'Who do you have in mind?' asked Margarite, thoughfully.

'Shanara Montgomery' said Lucius calmly.


	12. Chapter 12 : The start of something new

Chapter 13

Shanara sat silently as her father paced around his study in front of her. Robert, as the eldest, stood silently, his hand at the mantelpiece, playing with a figurine resting there.

Beren looked at his daughter with a mixture of anger and frustration and said 'I'm sorry, my love, but it is our only hope'.

Shanara smiled, a trifle distantly, and said 'I understand, Father. It's not that bad'.

'I like Blaise' she continued, 'He has been my friend for many years. You shall not face any opposition from me. Blaise however, is another issue entirely'.

Beren nodded and said 'Yes, his mother told me that he might be difficult but surely he must see how it is best for you both'.

'I hope so' said Shanara, tiredly, 'I don't know how much longer I can fight for'.

Both Beren and Robert exchanged worried glances and Robert said 'You're tired, little sister, go rest, Papa and I will handle things from here'.

Shanara nodded and left the room.

Turning to his Father, Robert asked 'Why Zabini ? His mother has never been one of our friends and we both know that neither you nor Mama have ever cared for her'.

Beren sighed and said 'You know what pureblood laws dictate, would you have your sister targeted further. Despite their scandalous nature, the Zabini's are powerful and Margarite Zabini is the toast of pureblooded society. Shanara could do a lot worse'.

Robert nodded and said 'What puzzles me is Lucius' involvement. Why would he put himself through so much trouble to instigate this union?'

For the first time Beren smiled, if a little wryly, and said 'He fears us'

Robert returned the smile, coldly and said 'Well, that goes to show that atleast one of the Malfoy's retains some sense'.

The two men sat in silence for awhile until Robert voiced something that had been troubling him, 'What of the secrets that we have taught Draco? The truths passed down only to the Montgomery's ?'

'An unbreakable vow', said Beren without looking up, 'I made him take one last night'.

'Good', said Robert, sneering with disgust at the thought of Draco, 'It irks me to leave him unpunished for his insolence. The effect of this entire affair on Shanara…..'

'….Is deplorable' agreed Beren, finally meeting his sons eyes 'And when I'm through, he will regret ever shaming the Montgomery's.'

Robert smiled and bowed to his father, 'I pity him if you have got your claws in him, father'.

'Claws ?' asked Beren, indignantly, 'I'm a Montgomery, do you think I'd touch such scum personally?'

Robert laughed and poured his father a glass of wine and the two men silently toasted to their plans.

* * *

In the morning parlor, Amara Montgomery and her daughter, Marya sat with Margarite Zabini, sipping tea. Anyone who glanced into the room could be pardoned in thinking that it was merely a polite affair with the three women making small talk. However, what was actually happening was that the two mothers were probing the waters, trying to see if they would get on well enough to call eachother family.

So far the two women were favorably pleased with eachother. Both realizing that they were first and foremost mothers, both deeply fond of their children and dedicated to their happiness. They also realized that they had a great many friends in common and seemed to have a similar sense of humor.

Margarite looked over at Marya, Shanara's sister, though the two elder women seemed to have formed a bond, Margarite had not been overly enthusiastic about making conversation with the younger girl. Remembering Marya from a few balls and masquerades, she had dismissed her as an insipid doll. She was therefore a little shocked to find herself being looked over carefully and that Marya's bright blue eyes were critical and analytical. Acknowledging, inwardly at least, that she had underestimated her, Margarite attempted to make amends by asking some polite questions about Marya's young husband, Adrien.

Ignoring this, Marya said 'I don't think you give a damn about Adrien, Madame, and for once, I too think he is of secondary importance'.

Smiling a little, she continued 'I want to know what your son's intentions are'

Taken aback, Margarite said 'They will be betrothed so naturally he intends to marry her!'

Marya smiled coldly and said 'She was once betrothed to Draco and look where that landed her', she paused for effect and then said 'No, I want to know that Blaise will not treat my sister in a similar manner'.

Margarite flushed with anger and snapped back 'Blaise Is a man of his word, if he decides to marry Shanara, he shall keep his word'.

Marya threw her head back and laughed, unexpectedly, and said 'excellent. In that case

Madame Zabini….I think we shall be very well suited together as a family'.

Slightly appeased, Margarite smiled back while thinking that she would have reassess a lot of things in her life now that it involved the Montgomerys.

* * *

Blaise was confused. He knew that he cared about Shanara. That he loved her…He always had but as a wife? Did he want to marry her ? There was only one way he could find out….so with that thought in mind, Blaise Zabini began scouring the Montgomery mansion looking for his bride-to-be.

He finally found her in a quiet room which was empty save for a couch and a grand piano.

Shanara was seated at the piano, her fingers idly playing her chords, her head in the clouds. Blaise watched her silently for a minute before she said, without looking up,

'I see that you've heard'

He nodded absentmindedly, even though he knew she wasn't looking at him and said 'Yes'.

'Are you upset?'

'No, Not really'

'I'm glad' she said, still refusing to look at him.

Blaise crossed the room and sat down next to her. Cupping her chin in his hand, he pushed it upwards until he was looking her in the eyes.

For one long moment they stared into eachothers eyes. Each acknowledging in some indefinable way that this was a moment to treasure. Each letting their guards drop for a brief moment of shared uncertainty.

Blaise didn't know what possessed him to do it, perhaps it was her quiet, clear, trusting gaze, or the fact that she was so close to him that he could feel her breath upon his cheek or was it the fact that somewhere deep inside himself he realized that he did infact, want this to work.

Whatever it was, the fact remains that Blaise Zabini leaned forward and in one fluid motion, pressed his lips to Shanara Montgomery's.

Shanara went rigid in shock for a second but before she could stop herself, she found herself melting into Blaise's embace. She was conscious only of his hard body against hers, the way his hands came up to cup her face and then trail through her hair, the faint moaning sound he made when she nibbled at his lip… the world seemed to become to much clearer – there was only Blaise.

When she pulled away from him for air, a couple of seconds later, she found herself looking up at him, dazedly and saying, 'what was that?'

'That, my darling', said Blaise, smiling mischievously, 'Is what life with me is going to be like'.

Laughing, Shanara said 'Where do I sign up?'

Smiling at eachother, they linked hands and went to tell their parents the good news.


End file.
